Full Sail University. 1st Real move.

RELATIONSHIPS...

     
PART 1:
    Honestly, this right here will not be understood completely. Its not meant to be. Everyone will have there own opinion on a subject. We can all read the same book and look at it differently....and I'm cool with that. When it comes to relationships, I feel the best way to go through with it, is to actually go through with it. This means go by your actions and your feelings, instead of others. Most people tend to ask for "help", which of course is cool and not bad,that is until the advice and the decisions along with it, usually,well Fucks Shit Up. Mind you, I said its cool to get "help" but you have to learn how to follow up correctly. Often I hear alot of problems from both ends of the table. Whether it be from a close male friend or female. Usually the same story too. " I don't know what to do anymore, she don't trust me" or " I cant trust him, I think he's cheating " Wellll , have you did anything to break her trust?,and thinking...well thinking, is different from knowing.

BROKEN TRUST/RECOVERY:
   I'm sure somewhere down the line we all have had our hearts broken or have been the person to do the breaking...and that's cool. Actually, sometimes a couple needs this. Being a man, I admit sometimes a relationship can get dull and repeatable.That's natural. That's life. After eating the same meal for such amount of time, your going to have that urge for something new,something fresh. I believe this idea goes the same for your spouse. Again, this goes for both sides of the table. See, the problem with this is if your going to step out, you have to know your boundaries and you have to be prepared to face the consequences. Knowing your boundaries is knowing what exactly are you doing. Is this new meal worth the flavor? Is you old meal REALLY that bad? and How far will u go with what your doing? Whats your limit?. Being a cheater ( yes I have cheated), I had to ask my self these questions before I actually decided I wanted to do anything. There was a bunch of problems I had that I felt was not being attended to by someone who I felt was suppose to, hold me down. I guess being young played a factor in this too, for there was too many girls, too many temptations and not enough composure from my part. Now I knew what I was doing, make no mistake about it. What I didn't think about was exactly who I was hurting. My spouse yes, but even more my self. Things was crazy. Late night meets, text's, lies, fights, more lies, Priorities all screwed up, etc, etc. I will spare you the details. But what I will say is that cheating takes a toll on you and the spouse. I honestly believe the person your with KNOWS that your cheating. They just get that weird feeling. That instinct.That in your heart,and guts, waking up in the middle of the night, catch them staring at you feeling. Trust me, THEY KNOW *( Drakes Voice)*. If they truly love you, they would know. But most times, even with all that feeling, they Stay quiet. They pace and wait in the dark. Ignore all the signs. Listen to all your lies. Right up until they have a talk with a friend and listen to their thoughts on the matter. That's when the real inspector gadget in someone comes out. That's when they no longer pace, read all the signs, catch you in all those lies they once looked over...and they start questioning. They puzzle the shit until the masterpiece of work you created comes to one,and oh boy, it's a beautiful one.
    Personally, I had created a Picasso type ordeal of art. I REALLY REALLY screwed up. After heading to work, and unknowingly leaving a program open, (to which I had direct connection to conversate with the person i was cheating with), it was an open invitation to hell's gate and my spouse was the gate keeper. This is where I had to face the consequences. Now i'm sure for most cheaters, this is what they'll have to go through. Hell and back. Especially if they really knew they fucked up, and realize the new meal was too good to be true. AND how good, and special, and divine the old meal really was. If you were good to your spouse, and had gotten cheated on. They will always want you back. That is without a doubt. With that said, I know your thinking, If I was sooo good, then why would he/she have cheated. Honestly, I cant say. Theres always different factors to play with. Everyone is going to have their OWN reasons. It might not be the right reason, but its their reason nevertheless. But as I said, IF u were good to your spouse and got cheated, they will be back. It's as sure as night following day. They are going to want that old meal.
    This is where everything starts. The realization of your new found love for your spouse (remember how I said earlier,sometimes its good to have cheat or been cheated, you'll realize alot). If he or she has really been worth the time. How good to you, he or she was. If yes, the person has been good, you'll be like ...damn, I had something, and it was good. If not, the person has been bad, you'll be like ....damn, I didn't have shit. Regardless, now it's time to face the consequences.Whether you choose to stay or choose to leave. Leaving, well is leaving. Nothings there. Never has and to me that means it never will be. Staying on the other hand takes alot more work. NO FOR REAL, A WHOLLLLLLE lot of work. The countless fights you'll have to endure, the always texting me to letting me know where you at, the coming home early if you live with the person, if not its the always spending of time with the person. The questionings. The more questionings. The even more questions. Its all the situations you'll have to face, if u decide you want this person back in your life. Its the path you have chosen, it didn't chose you. Now this goes for both sides of the fence. If you decide to give this person another chance, that's on you. You have granted the cheater a second term in office. Now its up to him/her to make it count. 9 times out of time, if the person loves you, hell/shell will go up and beyond to proof that love. The time will be put in. Now with that said, with time comes forgiveness. I know its something hard to do, especially if you thought this will never get done to you, especially not by him or her. But, you have to let it go. Especially if the person is definitively trying to make it work.You have to learn how to forgive. Every argument cannot reflect on the ONE time the person has cheated or done wrong. To me thats Hippocratic. If you forgive him/her you have understood the person did wrong and are willing to see pass that. That's why the second chance is there. To prove u didn't choose wrong. Now if its been years and you still haven't gotten over the fact your spouse has cheated then I believe its time you get some REAL help. Professionally. Or you can just let it go. Because I can tell you this, There's only so much a person will do to prove his or her love. After that, Realization WILL  be waiting there. That person will grow tire of having to prove innocence. I don't care what anyone says...you will get tired of having to repeat yourself. Ultimately, you want to look past the fact, take it for what is now, and just go through with it. Enjoy life, enjoy the mistakes, the ups and down. It builds character in yourself, your spouse, your relationship and in life in general. Remember Forgiveness is forgiveness. Anything else isn't.

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Havent done this in a while..

so i realized i haven't blogged about my recent shit that's been going on...sorry to all who read....but im working on a few things..getting things ready for an album im currently working on...everything is well...and i only hope that your life is going as accordingly as u would like it to be...if not keep ya head up and look forward to the better days...


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